The House Of Odd

You usually when someone forwards you an email joke it’s usually not funny. It’s usually plagued with cutesy pictures of cats and dogs, inspirational mumbo jumbo, or corny chain emails begging you to bother others by forwarding it on.

But for whatever reason this one was very amusing to me. So much so I’ve decided to repost part of it here. The author is unknown and my sincerest apologies go out to anyone in the following photos. Behold the Best of Olan Mills Portraits with commentary.

I wanted a shot like this for my wedding but she said no.

It’s called a leisure suit, ladies and germs, and if you didn’t have one in the early 70s, you were a big fat loser. Mine was teal. I wore it with a silk floral shirt and a long necklace with a football player pendant that we all got at that year’s team banquet. I was ‘the man’.

Once they had two or there how did they find time to make more?

Olan Mills backdrop #4: Bucolic Meadow with Split Rail Fence. Is that an animal carcass behind her?

A pose like this will get you kicked right out of the convention.

What better way to capture the charm and innocence of a child than to plunk him down amid the coarse trappings of a life lived in pursuit of wealth — oversized bills, an adding machine and the Wall Street Journal — and make him sit inside a briefcase? (They probably just fold up the little demon right in there to carry him home.) The finishing touch is the globe, which completes the portrait of the young Antichrist in Chess King vest and Red Goose loafers, plotting his takeover of the world (insert maniacal laugh). That is, as soon as someone changes his poopy diaper.

Bobbi isn’t the first waitress to fall for her manager, but she and Dale both got fired from Shoney’s.

Dawn and her recently exhumed sister, Gorgotha, pose with Scraps.

This photo isn’t discolored. The 70s really were that Orange.

And don’t miss the First Presbyterian Players as they perform Godspell next Wednesday night in the Fellowship Hall. Childcare will be provided. Please bring a covered dish.

Kenneth and his prom date.

You’d think Pearle Vision would throw in another two pairs for free.

Olan Mills Backdrop #11: The Library, one of their most popular themes, as seen in this photo of the young Unibomber and his wife.